Outreach in “Small Group”

Small Group

I belong to a group called simply “Small Group.” It’s part of our programming at the Unitarian Church in Westport Connecticut.

We have monthly assignments sent out by Martha. Past topics have included Cultivating Relationship and Holding History. For today, the topic is Widening the Circle. As you can probably guess, each is open to broad interpretation.

We have two assignments in each topic. The first focuses on one of the five questions with hints to help us. I made a choice for question 3. Each one explores the theme in different ways with different hints. Then there is another section which addresses the 16 questions for us to center on. I chose question 7, which says, How has your answer to “Are you racist?” changed over the years.

Choosing my two themes to focus on is difficult. For example, in choosing question 3 I had to consider that the section “How can we win?” was missing the main item in its directions. Still, I chose it because it seemed less daunting than the others! I realized that simply answering the basic question was enough for me.

Then my answer to question 7, “Are you racist?” has certainly changed in a major way. I don’t think I even considered racism a question in my high school years. Yes, I knew that putting on Black Face was obviously racist, but I didn’t identify it as an item for me to address.

How strange! I believe we all thought it was a criticism of racist behavior but not a mark on us! I got to college before I recognized that this was an important item and important in identifying myself as racist. So I changed. I no longer wanted to think of myself as racist.

Today we have a new member for our group. Her name is Caitlin.

Monthly Service at the Unitarian Church

The themes chosen for the Small Groups are also part of our monthly services. Rev. John Morehouse used Widening the Circle for his sermon on Sunday. He talked about a drop of water! In his story he described the drop of water which gradually sees the flowers wilting and the trees losing their leaves. He says, What can I do to change this?

The drop of water says he can change it by adding himself to a bucket of water. But will others follow? He waits for a long time, but finally another drop enters the bucket, then another, and then many. In the end, there are so many buckets that the plants rise up and are healthy again. He concludes the story by noting that the single drop of water led to a change everyone could applaud.

He talked about fear and courage. Fear is what one feels when threatened by something unknown or unseen. Courage gives us the opportunity to challenge fear, to override the threat.

Are You Racist?

Certainly the question about “am I a racist” brought to mind many questions. Was I a racist then, in high school? Or was I simply ignorant of the facts? Or is that what racists are, ignorant of the facts? Not today certainly but maybe then?

In summer school of grade 1, I was commended by my teacher for taking the hand of a Black girl to lead her to the bathroom. Did I not see another Black child in grade school and high school?

I certainly did not know that my town was a Sunset town, meaning all Blacks had to be out of town by nightfall. I only learned this term a few years ago. So when my soon-to-be husband came to visit in 1964, I guess he was regarded as a Black man, meaning he should not have been there at all!

Today I am regarded as an antiracist. The journey began in college. By the time I finished college, I was accepted in the Peace Corps and on my way to Nigeria.  Once there, I certainly did not hold racist views. Indeed, such racism disappeared. It has been replaced by my acceptance of all the people I came to know.