Uncensored and the Community Table
The author Zachery Wood in Westport.
TEAM Westport, our town’s committee to encourage multiculturalism, has been joining with the Westport Library to hold “Community Table” conversations. There is a speaker, usually an author, a question and answer period, and then a discussion on issues that arise from the presentation.
On Tuesday evening I was a facilitator for the Community Table conversation that followed a talk by Zachary R. Wood, who wrote the memoir Uncensored My Life and Uncomfortable Conversations at the Intersection of Black and White America.
Zachary Wood graduated from Williams College this year. He was president of Uncomfortable Learning. As the back jacket flyleaf says, the group “sparked national controversy for inviting provocative speakers to campus.”
He said it’s important to have uncomfortable conversations to help us understand others’ viewpoints and to reawaken dialogue. In his author’s note he says, “It is my hope that after reading this book, you will come away with the desire to learn more about the experiences and opinions of others—and the determination to use that knowledge to make a positive difference.”
Wood’s book Uncensored
The conversation at our table was lively and engaging, with everyone contributing. I think we all felt that we gained from his talk and our own! I bought the book; I’ve already read a few pages and found it very engaging.
Book group choice maybe?
And the most fun was reconnecting with Gary Stuart. He and I were classmates in 1st grade in Normal, Illinois! We even lived near each other on Locust Street!
My Peace Corps colleague, Jim Brown, somehow knew that Gary was from Normal and that had I lived there for a few years as a child. When Jim realized that both Gary and I were in Westport, Connecticut, he put us in touch. We’ve communicated a few times, but I didn’t remember him when he sat at my table on Tuesday night. Then he told me his name and I knew who he was!
Gary Stuart and me after the Community Table conversation
We’re going to have lunch next week. I don’t want to forget again!
Chukwukadibia – Greater Than the Dibia
Last time I asked you if you could guess or knew the meaning of Chukwukadibia, my husband’s long middle name. No one came forward to explain it. So I’ll tell you the story.
Both Clem’s father Samuel and his mother Grace had become Christian before they married. In fact, when Samuel went home to Nanka from his job in the logging industry to find a wife, he told his family that he wanted to marry a Christian, a rather radical idea at the time.
Clem’s mother, perhaps 1950’s, after completing her family
The men of his clan, following tradition, met to decide on their strategy. Someone knew that Grace, a young woman from the neighboring town of Agulu, had embraced the new faith.
Obiora, Samuel’s uncle, was sent to investigate. He did not approach Grace’s family, but instead went to a neighbor. In my new book I write:
After the required pleasantries about family, Obiora introduced the purpose of his visit. “I have come from Nanka, from the Onyemelukwe family,” he said. “They asked me to come to Agulu. I have come to you for your advice and help.”
He quoted a familiar proverb: “The bush where a child got a snail, there is where his eyes are drawn.” He continued, “Several Nanka men have taken wives from your town and our eyes are drawn here again. We know there is a daughter in one of your families who has become a Christian. One of our sons has also joined that faith. He is seeking a bride.”
Then he listened carefully. “The family is well-regarded here in Agulu,” his host said. “Their daughter Grace has indeed become a Christian, though her father is not happy about that. She is attractive and well-behaved, despite abandoning our traditional religion.”
After a few more comments about the merits of the young woman, Obiora took a sip of the palm wine he had been given. Then he said, “Has she been overly free with any of your men?” His host told Obiora that to his knowledge, though she danced with the other young women at celebrations, she did not follow any of the men into the bush after the dance was over.”
After the positive results from his initial investigation, Obiora was sent again to meet Grace’s father and other relatives. Her father had hoped she would abandon the new religion when she married. He was disappointed that her husband-to-be was actually seeking a Christian bride.
Although he approved the marriage, he uttered a curse, saying she would not bear children because she had left the traditional Igbo beliefs. She did not become pregnant for the first three years of their marriage. Finally she gave birth to Clement.
When she took her baby son back home to see her father, he proclaimed the name Chukwukadibia, meaning the Christian God is greater than our traditional shaman or healer, the Dibia.
June and July Family Birthdays
With just a few outliers, birthdays in our family come in June and July. We start with Kelvin, our daughter’s husband, on June 3rd. Our son Sam’s children Teya and Bruche were both born in June, as was our daughter Beth and son Chinaku, whose birthday is today!
Following that we have Beth’s son Kenechi on July 4th. As he said on the phone yesterday, when we watch the 4th of July fireworks next week we should remind everyone they’re for him! Kenechi’s little brother Ikem and sister Nkiru are also July babies!
Only my husband, our son Sam, his wife Onome, and I are not in the June and July birthday list!
Do you have a confluence of birthdays?
