My Long Absence

My Husband’s Passing

I last posted on December 17. Since then, I’ve been silent! My absence from blogging lasted much longer than I expected.

The reason? My husband Clement passed away on January 18. His death was not unexpected but still a huge loss!

He had non-smokers’ non-small-cell lung cancer which was diagnosed more than five years ago. He didn’t feel the effects until the last year. Then he began coughing a lot. He lost his appetite, didn’t move around much, and became weak. He was no longer reading the paper or checking his email, and was generally done with any activity.

He was never in pain, and died peacefully with me at his side, holding his hand, early on a Saturday morning.

He was 86, had lived a full and productive life and had long beat the odds for living with lung cancer.

Family Around

All three children and three grandchildren were here over the Christmas holidays, and two of the three children returned as soon as he died.

Our minister at the Unitarian Church, friends, and other family members too have been supportive and helpful.

Obituary Notices

I just sent off an obituary to The New Times and the Norwalk Hour. You can read the Norwalk Hour version here. I’m hoping The New York Times will publish it without making me pay for a classified listing.

Our marriage was ground-breaking, I told them! Interracial marriage was illegal in Kentucky where I still was a resident while I was in the Peace Corps.

I also pointed out that Clem is called the “Father of Electricity” in Nigeria since he was the Chief Electrical Engineer when the grid was designed. As he said, it was on his table that the grid was planned!

Why so long before sending out the obit notices? Because Chinaku, our first son, wanted to officially notify the elders in Clem’s village and post a notice in Nigerian papers before doing any notices here! That’s also why I waited so long to inform you!

We held a viewing at the funeral home here in Westport a few days after his death.

Our younger son Sam was not able to come back from Nigeria so soon, but the other two, and two grandchildren were there.

We will have a Celebration of Life for Clem on Saturday March 7, at 1 pm, at The Unitarian Church, 10 Lyons Plains Road, Westport, Connecticut, with reception following.