DMGS “Old Boys” Gather for Convention

Dennis Memorial Grammar School Convention

Clem and I were in Newark New Jersey for the weekend. The Dennis Memorial Grammar School, or DMGS Old Boys Association of North America, DOBANA, held its Convention from Friday to Sunday.

I have become accustomed to the term “Old Boys,” for alumni. It still makes me smile.

Dennis Memorial Grammar School, more commonly known as DMGS, was founded in Onitsha, eastern Nigeria, by the Church Missionary Society in 1925. It was one of the premier schools until the civil war in 1967-70, which brought destruction. There have been many changes in ownership, from church to state and back again.

Today it has in large part recovered its reputation. It is owned by the Anglican Diocese on the Niger with the Bishop on the Niger as the school’s proprietor. He doesn’t manage the school, but does help with its external relations, such as those with the state, and with fundraising.

We drove down on Friday afternoon, leaving Westport at 5 pm! Not a good idea! Friday afternoon in the summer, going through New York into New Jersey, means serious traffic.

So we arrived at the Newark Libery International Airport Marriott at 9, frustrated, tired, and hungry. After dumping our stuff, we rallied to look for the others at the “Meet & Greet,” which according to the schedule started at 8 pm.

The designated Salon A was empty except for 3 or 4 glasses and a couple of crumpled wrappers from the sweets the hotel puts out. I concluded we were too late. We went to the restaurant and had dinner.

Then I phoned Edith Dim; I had her number from an earlier meeting. She said, “Go to Room 504. The food and drink are there!”

We did. But the room was so full that the action was in the hallway. Igbo men are not quiet. For fear of disturbing other hotel guests, someone suggested returning to the original meeting room downstairs.

About 30 people gathered and stayed until after midnight! “It was a night of anecdotes, jokes, good food and great fun,” wrote Ndubisi Oguejiofor the next morning. We had missed the food. But they had brought down wine which I enjoyed.

The highlight of the Friday evening for Clem was when a graduate of 1997 came to say, with everyone listening, “This man is the topmost in the school’s history in physics. I’ve heard the name Onyemelukwe all these years! But I’d never met him.” Clem was thrilled with this acknowledgement of his academic prowess!

A period of at least 20 minutes was devoted to breaking kola. Someone had brought kola nuts and placed about six, the size of large walnuts, on a paper plate. He took the nuts to the president at the head of the table.

The president, as the evening’s leader, blessed the kola, then called a younger man to pass the plate so each man present could touch it.

Eventually, after several stories about kola, the man carrying the plate brought it back to the president who passed it to my husband. As the oldest man present he had the duty or right to break the kola.

But he hates doing this, so he prevaricated, speaking about the kola. I had gone to stand on the opposite side of the room so I could take his picture. When he began speaking in English, I reminded him, in Igbo, “The kola doesn’t speak English!” to the delight of the crowd.

When he finished he sent the plate back to the president who cut the nuts into small pieces so there were enough for everyone. Someone found a ceramic tray to replace the paper plate. At the end of the evening I found a few small segments of kola left over!

Small World Connections

Nigerwife! A highlight for me was learning that Marcia Nwosu who is from Jamaica had been a member of Nigerwives, Onitsha Branch, for years. I told her I was one of the founders and had gone to Onitsha to encourage a Nigerwife there to organize a branch in 1980 or ’81.

Marcia arrived in Onitsha in 1982 and found the group already formed!

Suggestions for Future Gatherings

I was disappointed that the spouses and children at this meeting did not get nametags. The DMGS men’s nametags gave their full name, year of graduation, and the house (dormitory) they were in. So Clem’s had 1951 and Howells House.

Women’s nametags could have our names and our husband’s names since we wouldn’t need space for year and house. They could even say where we live.

I often asked women their names during conversation. But most of the conversations were really short, and I couldn’t remember the names afterwards.

In addition to nametags, I would love to have a directory with pictures that I could refer to as I meet people. That would help me fix names and professions, and where people live. I’m at a distinct disadvantage – I can’t be confused with anyone else!

The next convention will be in Atlanta in 2020. Who will I remember by then?

Trevor Noah

My daughter has recovered from her spider bites. She did not see a doctor, but is aware of the advice from friends to do so!

She and her husband went to see Trevor Noah on Saturday night! I’m so jealous. She said they laughed solidly for an hour!

Do you watch him on The Daily Show? I often do, at 11 pm on Comedy Central. I read his memoir before I ever saw him. That’s what got me interested. It’s a fun read.